Chapter 21 update

This is not just a pipe dream. This is not just a pipe dream. This is not just a pipe dream.

Sorry, I just have to remind myself of that sometimes. When I first met the boyf, I was instantly attracted to him. He blew me away like no one had before. He made me blush when I spoke to him, and I was addicted. I still am. We got together and we gave birth to the frog. This was the most life changing thing that has ever happened to me, I cannot express in words how my outlook on the world has changed.....and.... I honestly feel as if I have found my calling in life.

THIS is what I want to do, this is what I am here to do. This is why I met the boyf and what the frog taught me during her entrance to the world.  This is me.

I have to go back to work in January, I may be going back for a year, two years or 22 years, but I will be going back. This isn't a terrible thing, I enjoy what I do, and I'm (quite) good at it, so I will be going back. But what is different, is that there is another job now that I am desperate to do, something that I have to give time, energy and love to.

I am so passionate about promoting better birth experiences for women in the UK. It is something that I want to be involved in more than anything. I have spent time trying to build connections in this world, but I have quickly realised that this is not going to make me rich and to do this along a part-time career and a full time job as a mummy is going to be tough.

I have a training course I hope to complete in the new year, which will cost about £2000 and I really hope to take part in the Liverpool Volunteer Scheme. I have started to volunteer at the NCT and hope to do a Hypnobirthing practitioner course later in 2012. ...

Its going to be a tough couple of years, Im lucky to have the support of a wonderful immediate family. My little family of three mean everything to me and they make me believe that everything is achievable. I have a couple of very close friends who follow their own bliss and inspire me to follow mine, the girls on Twitter keep me going with their energy and commitment, and I stand in awe of their constant strength. Even the haters out there, the ones who think I'm off my head, on another one of my crazy theories, even you inspire me, you give me motivation to prove you wrong.

Chapter 21 is starting slowly, it may be slow for the next few years. But this is not a pipe dream. This is me and I am going to make it.