My Crazy Frog

Since Birth, the frog has been a little 'clingy'...although I hate that term as it sounds so negative. I don't mind her attachment, we have a fantastic bond.
I remember when she was first born, all purple and covered in gunk. She lay on my chest and was screaming! I held her close as I tried to comfort her. It took what felt like ages, as I whispered "it's okay, it's alright, Mummy will take care of you."  Eventually she settled, warm against my skin.... and that is where she has wanted to be ever since.

Frog has always had a problem with two things, sleeping and being put down. She has never gone to sleep on her own.... ever. She was swaddled until she was 12 weeks old, and I could no longer get the swaddles to stretch over her and for the past six months we have played this game over and over again,

Feed, sleep, put down, cry. Pick up, feed, sleep, put down, cry. She wouldn't even sleep in her pram. She would lay there screaming until I picked her up, which I inevitably did, because I HATE hearing her cry. So we have formed this habit. At 7pm each night she goes to bed, and so it begins.

She wakes maybe 3,4,5 time a night. Every time I do what she wants, I take her out of the crib, comfort her, feed her and send her back to sleep. She is the only one of our baby group who doesn't sleep through the night. And not only does she not sleep through, she is a bloody insomniac! I know she is not hungry, I know she wakes for comfort, I know I could leave her on me, and we would both sleep all night, but I'm trying really hard to do my best by her.

She does need to get used to her cot, she can't sleep on me or in my bed (I will not co-sleep) but at the same time I will not leave her to cry in her crib (Despite the advice of all my family and even my HV)... its so hard work and I am so exhausted. I have not had a block of more than two hours in such a long time. It makes me want to cry. The boyf understandably loses patients with her when she screams, and with me for being so soft, but what else can I do? I promised I would take care of her, and that is what I will do.

I will feed her when she is hungry, warm her when she is cold and I will comfort her when she is upset. Even if it is 2am, 3am, 4am and 5... that is surely my job?

If anyone has any advice, tips or words of encouragement, they are very very welcome xx