Living on Love - January Challenge

Lovely Lacy from Living on Love has set a challenge...  Every month in 2012 the lovely Lacy will set us a challenge.. something fun to do as a family.

You can join in the challenge Here

Januarys Challenge was to get outdoors and have a free family outing. This was timed perfectly, for my first week back at work. Having quite a tough time adjusting to being away from the frog for 4 days a week, I spent the whole week counting down to Friday when the boyf, froggo and me would be spending the day together.

Just to add the icing on the Friday cake, the weather was bloody perfect. It was one of those cold cold crisp days. The sky was blue and you could see your breath in the air. We as a family decided to wrap up, get out and go to the forest. We had to drive (so I suppose it wasn't completely free) but we loaded up the car with two dogs, one frog, two very happy grown ups, a flask of coffee and a baby carrier.

It was perfect. Thinking about that day brings a tear to my eye, it was so perfect.

We walked and we talked and we walked some more. We breathed fresh air and watched the dogs have the time of their life...

When we found a bench we stopped for a coffee and took pictures of each other in the sunlight...

I'm having a really tough time of adapting to this chapter of my life. I miss my family terribly, I have an aching in my heart when I think of my life at work while other people watch over frog. Other people giving her breakfast, watching her crawl, develop, giggle. I know that it has to be done, and I know things will get easier but for now... Its so tough.

I really needed this day. This perfect wonderful day. the outdoors are available to us at any time, sometime we need a little push to appreciate them. Thank you Lacy, genuinely and whole heartedly, thank you xx

Human or Dancer

Do we build our own path or do we leave it to the hands of fate?

During our pregnancy with the frog I did massive amounts of research about birth, and birth choices. I was enthusiastic about Hypnobirth and used the technique during birthing. We had a lovely birth and were very pleased with the whole experience. It changed my perspective on birth, and in the weeks that followed I realised that, not only had I become a mother, I had opened the door to something else. A passion. A passion about birth, and becoming a mother.

The frog had unlocked something inside me, and I knew I couldn't let it end there. My research didn't stop, I spoke to Hypnobirth practitioners, read endless amounts of material and joined on-line debates and forums about birth and pre / post natal issues. I could read read read, and never get bored. Eventually I spoke to the boyf about my passion, and we agreed, this was not something I could let go to waste. This is something that I have to make part of our future. I am passionate that other people can have a positive birth and that there is so much that can be done to change the attitudes towards birth in this country. So work towards it we will.

But then real life gets in the way. I can not afford to give up work, We have responsibilities, two houses, two cars, a child, debt. I cannot be selfish and follow my dreams to the detriment of my family. Real life has jumped up and slapped me in the face.

So just when I sink back into my realistic but glum chair, fate plays a helping hand. Liverpool PCT are recruiting volunteer Doulas, to help people in the community. The courses are provided and payed for by the PCT. Unbelievable.

Honestly the same week that I start to doubt if my passion will ever become a reality, I receive the application form. Here is a way I can volunteer part time, and work part time. Embrace my passion, following my path, while not shunning the responsibilities of an adult.

So I ask you, are we Human, or are we Dancer?

Silent Sunday

I am new to Silent Sunday, despite having learnt today that a) it has been running for 10 months and b) that it has now ended :(... (thank you for the post @mummytoboo http://booandme.co.uk/2011/09/10/silence-for-silent-sunday/)

So I missed it, which Im quite sad about, but I understand how an idea can develop into a passion then into a poison. Hell, Jim Heselden died after one of his Segway's went off a cliff!

So despite missing the boat, Im going to try to join in the post-blog fun by adding my #SilentSunday, to mark the events of our week. We have spent the past week in a caravan, in a very wet part of Wales. It rained every day, but do you know what, it didn't matter. The three of us were together, we read, we talked, we ate. It was a lovely family holiday. So here is our picture to sum it up. Okay, so I know I just broke the rules because, it wasn't that silent. But its my first time... I promise to keep my mouth shut next time...

11/09/11  #SilentSunday